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how about giving me a new seed to grow a good one?
Wednesday, 11 January 2017
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mangoes
fruit
warranties
extended warranty
added bonus: no expensive electricity!
Monday, 09 January 2017
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jasper
money-savers
shredders
taxes
silence is (usually) golden
Friday, 06 January 2017
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shark tank
silent dog whistle
idiots
i'm optimistic that people find him annoying
Tuesday, 03 January 2017
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lottery
optimists
happy new year!
Saturday, 31 December 2016
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new years
calendars
idiots
now watch as I pull a rabbit out of my esophagus!
Thursday, 29 December 2016
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magicians
tracheotomy
scarves
hurry up, he's off to paint the town red!
Wednesday, 28 December 2016
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mr. literal
gas stations
gas
fill-ups
he came up with all these in a strait jacket
Monday, 26 December 2016
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cuckoo
cuckoo clocks
inventors
calculators
calendars
it's 856#%FKiih)8&^*#*$^W&Rk, idiot!
Monday, 19 December 2016
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game shows
passwords
giraffes ruin everything!
Friday, 16 December 2016
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giraffes
belt loops
streaks
71% haggle free!
Monday, 12 December 2016
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rolls royces
sales
marketing
idiots
he was tom, dick and harry in a half hour
Friday, 09 December 2016
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names
name-changers
although the crow is scared of heights
Tuesday, 06 December 2016
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scarecrows
crows
also saves money on toothpaste!
Thursday, 01 December 2016
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jasper
money-savers
shoes
"ok, who here has rabies? raise a paw!"
Monday, 28 November 2016
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raccoons
stand-up
open mic
lone ranger
treat me like a boulevard, not an alley!
Friday, 25 November 2016
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street cleaning
germaphobes
happy thanksgiving!
Thursday, 24 November 2016
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turkeys
thanksgiving
suicide
and where did i leave my fangs?
Tuesday, 22 November 2016
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vampires
alzheimer's
diseases
memory
now watch as I push a rabbit into my hat!
Friday, 18 November 2016
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slackers
magicians
magic
and the fireplace was asinine
Tuesday, 15 November 2016
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snowmen
beaches
beach houses
great then we can cut out the middleman and head right to sex
Monday, 14 November 2016
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drinks
relationships
bars
those fake people can really keep a secret!
Friday, 11 November 2016
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surprise party
imaginary friends
birthdays
birthday cakes
the kid never misses a day of panicking
Wednesday, 09 November 2016
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wolf
tonsils
boy who cried wolf
yayyyyyyy pawns!!!
Monday, 07 November 2016
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cheerleaders
chess
unnecessary jobs
recently bought spray paint to use on windshields
Friday, 04 November 2016
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cars
just married
cholesterol
TMI
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