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an elephant never forgets
Wednesday, 16 August 2017
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rhinos
keys
losing stuff
000001000111110101010101001010101000001100!!!
Friday, 04 August 2017
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blind dates
robots
bad blind dates
binary code
remember, you can't take it with you
Tuesday, 01 August 2017
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jasper
money savers
tips
co-pay
suicide
where does the time go?
Monday, 31 July 2017
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clocks
grandfathers
grandfather clocks
still not as good as the angel you sorta know
Wednesday, 26 July 2017
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devils
expressions
big savings on scotch tape, too!
Monday, 24 July 2017
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jasper
money savers
wrapping paper
"i'm sorry but 'hammer' can't be an answer"
Wednesday, 19 July 2017
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game shows
bad game shows
fly swatters
spatulas
boredom is toast
Saturday, 15 July 2017
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bread
toast
trampolines
happy
i bet it's a quarter!
Monday, 10 July 2017
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tin man
wizard of oz
metal detectors
beaches
sand
i had a feeling they wouldn't make it to august
Friday, 07 July 2017
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fireworks
bottle rockets
romance
ktyhjeakhyaehgagoehcladjaghye
Monday, 03 July 2017
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monkeys
typing
infinite
books
if you can prove you have asthma i'll bump it to 9
Wednesday, 28 June 2017
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wind chimes
jobs
blowing
lottery
*not related to spellcheck mcgregor
Thursday, 22 June 2017
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proofreader
proofreading
spelling
jones
proofreader jones
unfortunately glass won't be invented for another 100,000 years
Friday, 16 June 2017
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cavemen
optometrists
mammoths
he also yells when i pee in the house but HE pees in the house!
Tuesday, 13 June 2017
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dogs
chocolate
scams
poison
take a xanax, leggy!
Thursday, 08 June 2017
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butterflies
caterpillars
stomachs
nervous
nerves
metamorphosis
and his gingivitis was practically gone!
Monday, 05 June 2017
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invisalign
funerals
do bicep curls for free down at the junkyard!
Wednesday, 31 May 2017
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jasper
money-savers
money savers
toothbrushes
gyms
occam's tweezers
Thursday, 25 May 2017
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achilles
podiatrists
and my eyebrows are no longer unruly!
Tuesday, 23 May 2017
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cavemen
haircuts
"also, how am i able to type so accurately with no fingers?"
Monday, 01 May 2017
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dogs
google
fire hydrants
please frisk me!
Wednesday, 26 April 2017
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mr. lonely
cops
hot chocolate
no spit takes until the apocalypse
Friday, 21 April 2017
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saliva
spit takes
envelopes
emergencies
emergency
but they do like to travel up the ball return
Tuesday, 18 April 2017
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clowns
bowling
bowling shoes
buy one onion ring get a free mozzarella stick!
Friday, 07 April 2017
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witness protection
improv
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See Brian discuss his book on the Hallmark channel
Read the NY Times piece Brian wrote
Read about
Brian and Sam on Salon
See Brian and Sam on 'THE LIST'
Been There, Drawn That
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jasper (21)
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worlds worst (18)
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superheroes (18)
chapter 11 (17)
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