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or you could short-sheet their beds
Friday, 17 November 2017
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Tags:
dust
dust bunnies
maids
practical jokes
i just fell asleep reading this
Tuesday, 14 November 2017
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doctors
medical
anesthesia
boring
operation
"indigo truffle?"
Friday, 10 November 2017
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I.T.
jobs
interviews
idiots
job interviews
can i at least pick up my x-mas gifts?
Monday, 06 November 2017
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procastinating
halloween
kids
costumes
batman
thankfully her 7s look nothing like 1s
Thursday, 02 November 2017
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Tags:
divorce
therapist
numbers
abolish the spine tax!
Monday, 30 October 2017
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taxes
idiots
scams
money
saving money doesn't stink
Friday, 27 October 2017
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jasper
money savers
deodorant
clothes pins
anyone in the bullpen know a limerick?
Thursday, 26 October 2017
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baseball
pitchers
mounds
meta
punchlines
at the "no-ink" kiosk
Tuesday, 24 October 2017
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tattoos
idiots
minimalists
ink
*does not include subsequent time lost limping
Friday, 20 October 2017
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lyle
time-savers
elevators
buildings
jumping
but i didn't say anything about nickels
Tuesday, 17 October 2017
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counterfeit
parole
dimes
prison
would it kill you to load the dishwasher once in a while?
Monday, 16 October 2017
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Tags:
plants
yelling
children
idiots
order in next thirty seconds and get a free appendix!
Tuesday, 10 October 2017
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kidneys
organs
commercials
and if that doesn't work -- water polo!
Saturday, 07 October 2017
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seahorses
sea creatures
entrepreneurs
kentucky derby
horses
the stuffed giraffe tipped off the cops
Wednesday, 04 October 2017
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boogieman
cops
children
beds
stick to dumbbells, dumbbell
Friday, 29 September 2017
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weights
gyms
tweets
idiots
i bet she didn't wear sunscreen when she skinny-dipped!
Tuesday, 26 September 2017
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dermatologist
porn
moles
number of funeral invitations: zero
Friday, 22 September 2017
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hyena
raccoon
laughing
mocking
vultures
leave the keys in the ignition and add another three seconds!
Tuesday, 19 September 2017
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lyle
time-savers
cars
let me know when you decide to use helvetica
Monday, 18 September 2017
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fonts
talking
unnecessary
cambria
baskerville
and i might have an almond in my glove compartment!
Friday, 08 September 2017
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partying
oatmeal
faux pas
cheap
idiots
and assure them you'll cover the estate tax
Tuesday, 05 September 2017
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jasper
money savers
tips
restaurants
wills
al gore's favorite mythical creature
Thursday, 31 August 2017
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feet
carbon footprint
bigfoot
we'll add some pickles for your next set!
Tuesday, 29 August 2017
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worlds worst
trainer
exercise
sandwiches
pickles
if that doesn't work try maple syrup on the motherboard
Monday, 21 August 2017
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computers
worlds worst
soda
repairman
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See Brian discuss his book on the Hallmark channel
Read the NY Times piece Brian wrote
Read about
Brian and Sam on Salon
See Brian and Sam on 'THE LIST'
Been There, Drawn That
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